March 1999
s m u g
target audience
by Leslie Harpold

*

What are you losing?

In the newest trend to advertise products to consumers they can't get without a doctor's prescription, Merck picks up where Eli Lilly left off, pushing Propecia, a hairloss drug on the unsuspecting paranoid masses.

Lest we forget that we are a culture who believes in the magic bullet so thoroughly that we will put anything in our bodies in order to be more attractive or have better sex regardless of the consequences, I almost can't blame them. What's interesting about this particular pharmaceutical wonder though, is that there's clearly a tradeoff that has to be considered.

"A small number of men experience certain sexual side effects, each occurred in less than 2% of men."

The part about "women who may potentially be pregnant" not being allowed to take it or handle broken tablets because it causes a "certain kind of birth defects" must not seem as daunting, because they are considerate enough to flash that on the screen as well as reading it over the little 30 second film which I call "How Baldy Got his Groove Back."

So, clearly a decision needs to be made by those men losing their hair, risk continued hair loss, or risk losing projecting an image of being desirable. Basically I have no problem with Propecia itself - and I find it rather amusing that men are now being turned into the vain, self-conscious, insecure people that women are. As we know, advertising is based on fear, and the more fears they create, the more product they move.

See Buddy there? Looking in the mirror? He has a fair amount of hair, but the mirror is showing him that he's mere millimeters away from joining the clean pate club. This scene is clearly an homage of the 80s classic "The Best Little Girl in the World" where the anorexic protagonist stands in front of the mirror well beyond anything we could call thin, but sees a rotund reflection. See Buddy going to work? The same demons haunt him in the workplace elevator. He may be getting older, less attractive, his mack star is fading and he needs a little help. Clearly Propecia is the answer; after all, it claims to have stopped hair loss in 83% of men and even encouraged regrowth in many cases. How can he lose?

Finally we see Buddy at home, back in the mirror, inspecting his noggin -- now full of hair and feeling confident, Propecia having assuaged his hallucinations, he is now able to see the hair that was there all along. He looks good too, as the saucy redhead who just can't keep her hands off of him reinforces. Like most women, she's not looking at Buddy's eyes, or face or butt, or wanting to chit chat and see if he's a decent human being who might make her laugh now and then, she wants what every woman I know wants: to touch and enjoy a full head of hair! (Ladies, back me up on this.) Right? All that business about us telling you we think balding can be sexy or we like you for who you are is a lie, right?

We don't care who you are or what you're like, as long as you have a healthy looking head of real hair to make all our girlhood dreams come true.

leslie@smug.com

*

in the junk drawer:

featurecar
net
worth
chair
bumping
uglies
gun
smoking
jacket
barcode
ear
candy
pie
feed
hollywood
lock
target
audience
scissors
back
issues
dice
compulsionvise
posedowncheese
the
biswick
files
toothbrush
mystery
date
wheelbarrow
and such
and such
hat
blabfan
kissing
booth
martini















     
·feature· ·net worth· ·bumping uglies· ·smoking jacket· ·ear candy· ·feed hollywood· ·target audience· ·back issues· ·compulsion· ·posedown· ·the biswick files· ·mystery date· ·and such and such· ·blab· ·kissing booth·


·contents· ·freakshow· ·fan club· ·archive·



???

copyright © 1996 - 1999 fearless media